9
Sep
2010
Going Ga-Ga over the kid? Watch Yourself.
From funnyphotos.net.au
The other day our child was doing something TRULY and startlingly talented like waving or clapping or patting his head or something and after several minutes of cooing in delight, laughing, looking around smugly at nearby adults to ensure they were weren’t missing out on JUST HOW cute and awesome my child was, I got one of those from-the-outside-looking-in moments when you see yourself as others see you. And I realised with shock I was being one of those parents I had so often looked at with bemusement and a little bit of pity. One of those parents who THINK their child is being TRULY and startlingly talented but is actually just being, well, a baby and they, meanwhile, are making complete idiots of themselves by displaying sheer, unbridled pleasure in the face of something that is in fact very mundane and everyday, and consequently are demonstrating a complete lack of judgement and self-perception that makes them VERY UNCOOL and, quite frankly, a little bit embarrassing.
God. All that bloody excitement. Over a little bit of clapping.
11
Aug
2010
The Longest Summer Days
This is not what my summer holidays are like (photo: Supagroova)
When people talked about long summer days, I always had the impression that it was a positive thing. Clearly I wasn’t talking to many parents on the topic. Summer days are not just described as long by parents because the sun is in the sky a lot longer but because you are with your child (or, gold help you, children) AAALLLLLLL day. For a lot of us, that’s a new and surprisingly excruciating experience. No playgroup, no childcare. And then there is all the extra effort of stopping your child breaking everything and discovering a whole new set of dangers in another house. There is no small amount of additional time and energy spent monitoring the movements of a child intent on discovering every corner and no-go zone of the your chosen holiday accommodation. The ornaments, so many sodding ornaments… I’m hoping for a minimalism come-back to sweep the rental properties industry, without the sharp corners.
24
Feb
2010
And the role of mother will be played by ME.
Does anyone else ever feel like they are just pretending to be a mother? Like how did you get here and what are these words coming out of your mouth? Sometimes I really feel like I am playing the part in some mothering sitcom (with the requisite somewhat irritating child with a lisp and the small baby played by twins. Only not played by twins in our house – played by just the one baby thank god. Not that I don’t like twins. It’s one of those concepts that is so nice in theory and the matching outfits divine, but the reality seems like some bad horror movie – IMAGINE two year old tantrums in tandem, I think I would retire to the Galapagos, Or someplace equally far away with a beach and no twins. Sorry to those who have twins. I love twins. Twins rock. Twin rant over).
I woke up on my 30-something birthday this year and lay there marvelling about the fact that I have a husband and two children. A full on family. I know I have already expressed my shock, but I am still wondering – WHEN did that happen?
