Recovering from the ‘other kind’ of birth

It does not take this many openings - I swear.

I am a small-time c-section veteran, having got two babies up and out ‘through the sun roof’. Not on my own you understand – there were a few doctors and nurses, but basically I am tough and brave. As an obsessive planner, the second time round when I knew I was having another one, I did some serious research. I also bought a lot of unnecessary gear and freaked out a lot. Even if you’re planning the most natural of natural births, stuff happens sometimes and it always pays to freak out in advance. Oh wait – is that right? Anyway, based on absolutely no medical experience whatsoever (although I have watched a LOT of Gray’s Anatomy which is pretty much the same thing), here are my personal top tips for recovering from a c-section:

• Start moving as soon as possible following the birth and your ‘legs coming back’ after the spinal/epidural. It will feel uncomfortable but it makes it MUCH easier, you’ll be less stiff. It’s a bit scary but if I could get up and into a chair to feed less than 6 hours after the first and into the shower within 8 – YOU can definitely do it. Your insides will NOT fall out on the floor. Put a cushion over your tummy as you lean up (or cough or laugh by the way. Because most people feel like a good comedy routine directly after giving birth ) and stand up straight. Shuffle and pretend you are Cliff Young.
• If you feel nauseous after the op, tell someone straight away – you can get magical medicine for that. If you vomit for three hours on and off the first time and you tell them that the second time and they still don’t give you enough of the anti-nausea stuff – yell a bit. I’m just saying.
• Contrary to popular opinion, you really shouldn’t feel any true ‘pain’ if you don’t want to. A midwife told me that first time round and it was like a revelation – basically, you need to keep on top of your painkillers. Make sure you know what you’re supposed to be having when and get it on time. If you’re in a lovely private hospital with sympathetic and kindly midwifes who will rush in at the press of a button, this should be fine. If you’re in a 4 bed NHS ward with (equally lovely but often horrendously overworked) busy midwives and a medicine schedule, you might have to get a little more ummmm pushy. Ask for those painkillers before you feel the pain. If you are a tough cookie who wants to avoid the painkillers, go for it.  I am a big fat massive wimp. Who was told may I add, that I had a very high pain threshold. Husband claims that that is something they tell all patients to make them feel proud. I cried yesterday when I banged my head – I fear he might be right. Either way – if you want them, get the drugs, you don’t have to suffer.
• Breastfeeding should be aok – well, as far as breastfeeding may or may not be. A fricking nightmare or a lovely warm bonding experience. C-section shouldn’t make much difference – the first day or so you might need help with positioning, but midwives should be able to help you with that. Except the evil middle of the night ones who tell freaked out mothers that brand new baby has a tied tongue and will need surgery and it turns out there is nothing wrong with said child. If you get THAT midwife, send her my regards. Ahem. Anyway, I found football hold to be quite good. A tip – the first 24 hours at least following the c-section you WILL need help getting your baby out of the crib and onto the bed with you for feeding. If you partner is not allowed to stay with you then just start ringing that bell when you need help. It doesn’t matter that it is the middle of the night – if you want to feed your baby – RING THE BELL AND ASK FOR HELP.
• Don’t freak out about going to the loo. It’s not that bad.
• If you didn’t know you were having a c-section – send someone home for 10 pairs of massive black undies and tracksuit/yoga pants with very high waist, sitting above scar basically. If you do know you are having one, see here for baby essentials spreadsheet which includes hospital packing list.  Don’t buy a c-section recovery kit. Or heat paddy things that tie around your waist. You won’t use them.
• Make sure you have help waiting at home. Do not lift anything heavier than your baby. For a MONTH. This is harder than it sounds. This means no shaking the duvet, no hanging out the washing. Actually, if you’re me, this is actually easier than it sounds – I bloody hate housework and this was the perfect excuse. Husband cottoned on to the excuse when the first baby was about 5 months old. But seriously, if you have a planned or unplanned c-section, you need to have help at home when you get back. If partner can’t kick in, arrange someone else to help with cooking and cleaning. Looking after your baby will be fine. Looking after your toddler – not so much. They need lifting in and out of cots, nappy changings, cuddling, highchairs, rescuing off the top of slides, etc etc. So if you have other children, you will need help even more the second time around. My mum made my bed every single day for two weeks following the second baby. It made me want to cry with joy every time I went into my room. I know, I was a little tired.
• Take all the drugs you are offered when you go home. You don’t have to take them, but having them there is comforting. I only needed the super strength panadol when I got home, but as I say, I am extremely tough. Of course, I called for a stretcher after said head banging incident yesterday but I think that was an aberation.
• Like after any birth, sleep whenever you can. Rest. With other children this is relatively tricky I know. I didn’t do much of this the second time round and I am actually still here.  If you want to see people because you think you are going crazy, see them. If you can’t face anyone while your house is in chaos due to not being able to cook or clean, don’t see them. You get to be the total boss for at least a month. After that – well, I’d keep playing the ‘major surgery’ card if I was you. You may never have to iron again.
• If you have any pain, weird looking stuff, cysts etc on your scar – get to the GP. It may be absolutely nothing (and you may feel like a goose when it turns out to be an ingrown hair – but it COULD HAVE BEEN A SERIOUS INFECTION OK?) but you might stop anything serious developing so better safe etc. It will be numb and it will get itchy. Normal.
• I highly recommend sitting and resting for several weeks. You must drink lots of water. You must also eat many chocolate biscuits. And cakes provided by well meaning friends. That is medically necessary. When you start to get a wee bit bored with sitting and eating cake (are you MENTAL?), you can exercise. Walking is recommended basically straight away, so just do it slowly and build up each day. After that, ask your doctor. Generally they say six weeks for any real exertion. I felt ready for slow jogging after about a month both times, but freaked my doctor out by actually doing it the first time and after reading lots of links I understand why.  So just ask your doctor. Certainly, if everything goes really smoothly, you should be aok to exercise properly (sigh – goodbye fantastic excuse for sitting on rapidly expanding bottom eating chocolate biscuits) after six weeks. Apparently you need to be especially careful about some stomach exercises (der) – ask someone who knows because I would just be making it up. Anyway, your stomach will return to a completely pancake flat six pack about two weeks after giving birth – this is caused by breastfeeding. Here is what I looked like eight weeks after giving birth.
• Don’t believe the bollocks about not driving for six weeks. Although you might want to wait til your catheter is out at least. Alternatively, see how you are feeling and check your insurance papers – they’ll usually say once your doctor gives you the all clear to drive. And depending on your recovery, that might be not for a month and that might be after a couple of weeks.
• If you want to help out a post c-section mother, it’s basically the same as for any new mum – leave her meals at the front door, look after her existing kids, offer to do the nursery run, send her out to get her nails done, buy her trashy magazines, offer to address all her thank-you notes. If you want to babysit etc you need to INSIST and arrange a time. Just offering won’t work.

So, this was obviously just my list based on my experiences. Other sources of info are below, but if you have any other hot tips, please leave a comment below.

• http://pregnancy.about.com/cs/cesareansection/a/aftercsec.htm
• http://www.csectionrecovery.com/topics.html
• http://www.birthrites.org/caesarean.html
• http://www.babycenter.com/0_recovering-from-a-cesarean-delivery_221.bc

photo credit: simonov

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